Positive Discipline Tool Card: Connection Before Correction
Positive Discipline Teacher's Tool Cards by Jane Nelsen and Kelly Gfroerer and Positive Discipline Parenting Tool Cards by Jane Nelsen and Adrian Garsia, each offer 52 Positive Discipline tools that are available to help with many teaching and parenting challenges. Connection Before Correction is the highlighted tool in this blog post.
After trying out this tool with the children in your life, please share a story of success, or struggle, you've had with it. Thank you! The more you apply the Positive Discipline teaching and parenting tools, the more they will become a part of your own lifestyle. Practice makes better!
Story - 11-year-old Sam kept interrupting his teacher, Mr. Jones, in class. It was very frustrating for Mr. Jones, because he couldn't get through his lesson plans. Although Mr. Jones showed patience towards Sam and thought he showed caring, Sam continued to interrupt him on a regular basis. Also, other students in the class were getting frustrated and unfocused because of it.
Mr. Jones decided to do the tool "Connection Before Correction" and invited Sam to discuss the interrupting issue with him during lunch or after school one day that week. Sam picked after school one day and they met. Mr. Jones explained what he noticed - Sam interrupting while he was teaching - and asked Sam for help to resolve this issue. Together, they brainstormed some solutions and Sam picked one to try that week (It was write down what he wanted to say at the moment to Mr. Jones and share his list with him after school). This worked and what Mr. Jones realized is that Sam was needing some special time to connect with him. When that was taken care of, through the connecting part of Sam sharing his list with him, the need to correct Sam was greatly reduced.
Story - 16-year-old Carly wanted to go to a party with her friends. Her mother, Kara, had heard through the parent grapevine that the parents whose house the party would be at, allowed under-age drinking at their parties. She brought this up to Carly who claimed there wouldn't be alcohol there.
When Carly pushed Kara for an answer, Kara said, "I love you and the answer is, no. You are welcome to invite some friends over here that night, instead, if you'd like." Carly was angry and disappointed and stomped off to her room. Kara went about her business and later that afternoon, Carly approached her mom and said two of her friends would be coming over the night of the party.
Where can you purchase these tool card decks? The card decks are available at www.positivediscipline.com (Select products, then select tool cards) and there are versions available for iPhone and Android in the App stores on the phones.